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  • Writer's pictureDarlene Dennis

When things are not always clear .. then they are ..


So life has been busy .. for both Debbie and I. The hustle of providing for our families .. being present for those we love .. it all can make the days hurried and hectic.

This morning I was walking .. it is something I seriously "need" to do more of. This year has been quite eventful and a gamechanger of sorts .. I started some really good habits after my tsunami but lately I am catching myself getting complacent and for the love.. lazy. Lazy in a different sense. I work various jobs and do alot of feel good stuff in tandem with raising my daughters single handedly - - so most who know me would laugh at the thought of me classifying myself as 'lazy'. . . but I have been. I haven't tended to myself, I've wasted time doing meaningless things to avoid doing hard things, I have eaten food that was easy but the not best for me, and I've gone to bed later than what is good .. but the worst of it is I have let some self doubt creep in. for the love.

Debbie and I are in the prepping stage of offering another module tied to Soul Restoration called "She Did It Anyway" .. It is a more complex module, with more deep digging and more art and takes a FULL day .. so needless to say the prep is taking a bit more time too. As God would have it .. I find myself grinning through it. I've taken this course close to a half a dozen times now .. seriously. Between doing camp, doing it online, becoming teacher certified and now walking one of my daughters through the entire program one on one .. I should be able to recite some of it in my sleep (actually alot of SR verbiage is part of my daily lingo now - and that is a blessing). So as I am preparing, it has really kicked me in the arse. So I've really had to push myself this week to get back into the habit of the good things that I had set in so firmly in place ..

I am now saying 'no' just a bit more so I can say 'yes' to the really important stuff. I am planning out my meals go forward so I can shed the few pounds I let creep back on by being haphazard, I am scheduling doctor's appointments so there are no surprises, I am putting my needs up front and doing some self care I let slip, and I am resting more. Today, I woke up and took the wee one to school at an ungodly hour because she is wanting to be more dedicated to Running Club.

so if my little one is getting on board from listening to me for months on end .. then I need to get it in gear as well. So after I drop her off at 6:55 am, I then turn a few corners and end up at our local beautiful lake. . that has a path that if walked is 3.75 miles and I can burn 400 calories .. I can also stop by a spot and do devotional time via my Iphone app and then also listen to my music and ponder/plot/plan OR listen to a podcast .. and be done in exactly an hour and ten minutes which puts me at my office desk by 8:20. win for the win.

So as I stop to do prayers .. I find myself asking God am I really doing what He needs me to do? Am I really the one to help to facilitate this curriculum? (and the I really know better but this is my default dna coming out) .. am I really good enough for all this? I need a sign. and the moment I open my eyes I see this:

and then it is clear.

When Debbie and I came to this path .. it was something that was beyond 'us'. I truly believe that as I do with everyone that is in my careful circle of these days. We were sitting in the cabin in McCall at our SR training late at night whispering all our excitement and what we could do for years and how this would come to be and what this could mean for families .. for children .. for marriages .. total hope and goodness .. etc etc etc .. and we came up with the name "Restore to SOAR" .. so others can "soar" in life .. and be free from all the junk that we get chained up to.

My eyes opened to this .. The geese were soaring .. and there is not just one .. not just two .. there are MANY. Which to me means we ALL have a part .. we ALL can soar .. and we ALL shall .. at just the right time and we are enough to do that work whatever it may be.

We are moving slower than probably what we'd like .. yet that is okay. This is here to be. This is here to evolve .. because everyone needs this. There are plans .. big plans .. for the retreat house .. and for a temporary solution in the Spring so we can execute the first of many 4 day retreats . . and in the interim we are doing one day modules.

Both Debbie and I have seen this revelation .. We've all been told too many lies in that we have to change .. but really the truth is we just have to RESTORE back to the perfect being we were originally created as. Plain and Simple. and we know what a gamechanger this work is.. we know because we are living it.

Hang in there with us.

We are doing it anyways :)


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